You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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