Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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