From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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