Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
