their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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