I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
