we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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