I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
