Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
