The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
