im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
