just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize