I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Green mimosas i think yes
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize