Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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