he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
