well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
