I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
