I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
