hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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