The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
