I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Operation Purity has been aborted
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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