Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
