the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
