How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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