I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
