dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
