Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
