Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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