She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize