Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
