youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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