I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize