So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
