I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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