We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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