i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
