Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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