North Korea, Best Korea!
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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