Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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