Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think I sprained my soul last night
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
