Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
