This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
they're like a gay fantastic four
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
