The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
