i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
