Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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