i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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