Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize