The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
