my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
