Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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