yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
why is half of my head shaved?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
