in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize